Erin - China Updates

Hey Everyone,


Erin Mcavoy here. It's been a while since I last wrote on the blog so I thought that I'd update you all on my life. Sorry for not posting anything recently, but everytime I try to write something on this site, it closes on me. Hopefully it works this time so I can regale you all with stories of my adventures in China. Again, I'd like to stress that this is Erin writing on the blog and not Tony.

To be honest nothing too exciting has happened to me. Over winter break, I got a lot of free time so me and some other friends traveled throughout China. It was quite fun and you should check out pictures on the blog. There was one slight hitch during the vacation when I got kidnapped and was forced to work as a sex-slave in an opium den in Northern China. For a couple weeks there, things were looking pretty bleak. Fortunately, I managed to send an SOS to Andy and Phred by tatooing help messages on the backs of my "clients" by using dried opium while they were passed out. Andy and Phred managed to get my message while tanning at a local beach. I'll spare you the details, but they put together a daring rescue. I would compare it to the scene in Rambo III when Sylvester Stalone destroys an entire Vietnamese village by himself in under ten minutes. The highlight was when Andy, after just subduing a group of ninjas with his karate moves, threw a giant machete at a mongolian who was trying to level a gun at him. The machete of course pinned the mongolian to the wall prompting Andy to deliver the classic one liner "stick around."

I was extremely grateful to be rescued and gave Andy and Phred huge hugs. We then began the trip back to our schools so we could continue teaching english to the chinese. However, on the trip back I accidentally waved in the presence of a police officer. The officer mistook my gesture for a peace sign and I was immediately arrested as a political prisoner. After several weeks, the endless torture was wearing on me (although on a side note, waterboarding isn't as bad as the news makes it out to be). I managed to send an SOS to Andy and Phred by constructing a paper airplane from part of my passport and expertly throwing it so that it would glide 10 miles right into Andy's apartment window. Of course I missed and it glided into Phred's windown instead. Nevertheless, the message was received and another daring rescue began. Long story short, they dug a underground tunnel which spanned several miles and opened up in my cell. Once this tunnel was completed, They escorted me out and put a pig in my cell. They then used dynamite to blow the big into a million unrecognizable pieces. The prison naturally assumed that I died of spontaneous combustion (its notoriously common in prisons) and I was home free.

Now I'm back teaching english to the chinese. I'm also writing a textbook. However, I'm mainly concerned with finding a decent guy. I only wish I could get as lucky as Leah and find someone as amazing as Tony. Anyways, I hope everyone is well.

Sincerely, Erin